When I look at Job, he had friends that were so hard on him, with friends like this who needs enemies? His friends failed him horribly in their efforts to ease his pain. Instead of showing sympathy, they threw accusations that made things even worse. Yet Job was able triumph over this even though he was in a state of pain and was very confused. I think if we take a look at Job and all he went through, we can find the example we need in our struggle with relationships with others. He prayed for his friends, with all he was going through he took the time to pray for his friends.
Hebrews 42:7 And it was [so], that after the LORD had spoken these words unto Job, the LORD said to Eliphaz the Temanite, My wrath is kindled against thee, and against thy two friends: for ye have not spoken of me [the thing that is] right, as my servant Job [hath].
42:8 Therefore take unto you now seven bullocks and seven rams, and go to my servant Job, and offer up for yourselves a burnt offering; and my servant Job shall pray for you: for him will I accept: lest I deal with you [after your] folly, in that ye have not spoken of me [the thing which is] right, like my servant Job. 42:9 So Eliphaz the Temanite and Bildad the Shuhite [and] Zophar the Naamathite went, and did according as the LORD commanded them: the LORD also accepted Job.42:10 And the LORD turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before.
Jesus also prayed for His friends even though they failed Him. (John 17:6-19) when you look at how Jesus prayed for Peter even though He had the heaviness of the cross on His mind, even though He knew Peter would deny Him not just once, but three times, He still took the time to pray for him. Jesus prays for us (John 17:20-26) and will continue to pray for us always, even when we act like His enemy, sometimes. He still intercedes for us.
So when we have a conflict with a brother or a sister, we need to forgive them and pray for them. If we need to confront him, we do it is a loving way, a gentle way. If he is offended by it and shuns you, then pray for the situation, if you feel you have done everything possible to restore this friendship, then you need to just leave the rest to the Lord.
I feel it is so much harder to be hurt by a brother or sister in Christ then the world because you know what to expect from the world, you do not expect to be hurt by believers, but we have to remember, we are still in the flesh. When I look back at what Job went through, how difficult his friends made it for him, I want to remember to pray for those around that have hurt me. I think if we do not forgive and do not pray for them, our relationship with our Savior is not as strong as it should be. It is sometimes hard to let go of the hurts because they can be very deep, but I know friendships can be restored because we all know this is what the Lord wants.
We need not climb into heaven to see whether our sins are forgiven; let us look into our hearts, and see if we can forgive others. If we can, we need not doubt but God has forgiven us - Thomas Watson
(1 Pet 2:18 NRSV) Slaves, accept the authority of your masters with all deference, not only those who are kind and gentle but also those who are harsh
(Rom 12:17-20 NRSV) Do not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. 18 If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. 19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave room for the wrath of God; for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord." 20 No, if your enemies are hungry, feed them; if they are thirsty, give them something to drink; for by doing this you will heap burning coals on their heads.
Spurgeon, "Ripe Fruit" #945. Micah 7:1
As we grow in grace, we are sure to grow in
charity, sympathy, and love. We shall, as we
ripen in grace, have greater sweetness towards
our fellow Christians. Bitter spirited Christians
may know a great deal, but they are immature.
Those who are quick to censure may be
very acute in judgment, but they are as
yet very immature in heart.
He who grows in grace remembers that he is
but dust, and he therefore does not expect his
fellow Christians to be anything more.
He overlooks ten thousand of their faults,
because he knows his God overlooks twenty
thousand in his own case. He does not expect
perfection in the creature, and, therefore, he
is not disappointed when he does not find it.
When our virtues become more mature, we shall
not be more tolerant of evil; but we shall be more
tolerant of infirmity, more hopeful for the people
of God, and certainly less arrogant in our criticisms.